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Spaces & Exchanges/0ral

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Spaces & Exchanges/0ral
Message de lolosch posté le 17-02-2016 à 16:38:21 (S | E | F)
Bonjour je vais bientôt passer mon oral d'anglais sur la notion espace et échange, voici le texte que je compte présenter, n'étant pas très forte en anglais pourriez-vous m'indiquer s'il y a des fautes ou autre, merci d'avance !
The notion I am going to deal with is "Spaces and Exchanges". To begin with, I'ld like to give a definition of the notion : an exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. It can also be seen as a continous movement or circulation. They are different kinds of exchanges : media, people, trade... To illustrate the notion, i have chosen to talk about the refugee and the immigration US-Mexico.
To begin this first part, what's a refugee ?
A refugee is someone who has forced to flee their country and unable or unwilling to return because of a well-founded fear of persecution based on nationality, religion, race, membership of a particular social group or political opinion.
In class we studied the story about an illegal immigrant. Iqmat is the name to this illegal immigrant, he has 17 years old, he decided to leave his country in Afghanistan like a refugee to keep them above the poverty, the war, persecution and political conflict. After losing his family, he went in England to get a job and start a new life. It's also the case for the refugee, they leave her country in order to get a job, to get more freedom, some help and start all over again.
Now in a second part, I'm going to talk to the immigration US-Mexico. Over the last decades, the US-Mexico border has been a burning and debated issue. It is one of the longest borders in the world and also one of the busiest. Indeed, it has become a strategy place of legal and illegal business. Not only do commercial exchanges take place there, it is also a nerve centre for drug dealing. The border acts like a magnet for Mexican immigrants who dream of a better life in the USA. Actually the job offers are limited in Mexico and the standards of living are much lower than in the USA. Contrary to Mexico which is struck by unemployment and poverty, the USA appears as a land of opportunities as far as the job market is concerned.
That is the reason why many destitute Mexicans cross the border, whether legally or illegally. That is the paradox of the situation of the Mexican immigrants. They represent more than half of the immigrants in the USA and while some Americans aim at limiting their numbers, others view them as a cheap labour force.
As a conclusion, we can say that even if the Mexican immigration remains debated, it is indisputably a source of economic and cultural wealth for the USA. Nevertheless, the American Dream sometimes turns out to be more an utopia than reality.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 17-02-2016 17:10


Réponse: Spaces & Exchanges/0ral de laure95, postée le 18-02-2016 à 10:29:17 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Mêmes remarques que pour l'autre notion: tu ne définis pas "space" + il manque une problématique et un plan.

- They are different kinds of exchanges: THEY ARE = ils sont et pas "il y a".
- the refugee: mettre au pluriel and the immigration (il manque un mot)US-Mexico.

- A refugee is someone who has forced: mettre au pasif.
-to flee their (singulier)
- Iqmat is the name to (pas la bonne préposition)this illegal immigrant,
- he has 17 years old: pas le bon verbe pour l'âge!
- to keep them (à qui réfère THEM?)
- political conflict: mettre au pluriel)
- the refugee: pluriel.
- they leave her (pas le bon possessif) country

- the immigration US-Mexico.
- a strategy (mettre l'adjectif)place of legal and illegal business.
- Not only do (à enlever) commercial exchanges take place there,
- Actually the job offers (participe passé) are limited in Mexico

- Au début de ta conclusion, tu dois résumer ce que tu as dit dans tes 2 parties.




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